Day 2/ Nursing:

Nursing:


I don't know why I try or why I want to try. When it is successful I get this overwhelming feeling of joy. I just can't stop smiling. Why does this happen? Nursing has never been one of those things that are all that important to me. I know it is best for the baby but my true motivation for it is money and the cost of formula! Yesterday we tried nursing again. Bad latch every time. It hurt. When she has a bad latch I get this overwhelming feeling of pissed-off-ness. I start to hate nursing, pumping, everything about myself, and life in general. It take several days to recover from a bad latch. I need to remember this and say 'screw it' to nursing and stick to my reliable nipple torch-er device. I hate nursing, enough said.


Day 2: 


If it hadn't been my bosses birthday and my desire to buy her a cheese cake, I would have done fabulous on my diet. It was a very small piece and I did stay in my calorie restrictions for the day. Working out is so hard to do in the evenings. Lillian has her fussy times and it is always at night. During the day, she is great, hangs out in her swing and will watch me workout as her brother is watching John Deere movie. I got the 20 minute HIIT workout done before supper. I made supper and then the fussy girl starts her evening need to be held and SHHHHHHed. I managed to get her to sleep enough to do another workout but it wasn't the one I was supposed to do. I was supposed to do a 45 minute less intense workout too but knowing I wouldn't have enough time I did the 20 minute one again and back tracked about half of it and did that again. I figured the higher intensity would make up for the lack of time I worked out. I was right though, by the time I worked out, took a very quick shower, Lillian was ready to eat again. Having to work again this morning, I couldn't stay awake until 11 with no nap just to do this workout. I managed and did the best I could. 


My Mom and I are doing a little weight loss incentive. Whoever looses the most weight in the one week time gives the other $5. I have lost 2.5lbs in the last week so I win!! I am now $5 richer. Thanks Mom!